Yesterday was my birthday. My neighbors gave me the gift of quiet. I gave myself the gift of digging in the dirt, adding water, digging some more and ending up all muddy. There used to be a tree next to my spa, you see. Well, here, see:
It was right in that area that is surrounded by pavers. Why anyone would plant a tree that close to the spa, the house, and the patio is a mystery. It was a beautiful, giant crepe myrtle with red blooms, too. You can imagine the mess when the blooms started dropping, right over the spa, every damn day (or so it seemed.)
A closer look at the hole, before excavation:
Yeah, Root City. I subsequently took out the rest of the pavers and began digging. I found my sprinkler lines. I found the extra line that goes over to the outdoor shower: the useless outdoor shower that only sprays cold water so, um, WHY? And I found some REALLY BIG roots that run under my sprinkler lines and, apparently, continue on under the patio.
I gave up and came inside to take a shower.
The picture is blurry but please note the extra pinkness about my cheeks. This is two hours after over-exerting myself. I always get red in the face, have done since I was a kid. It tends to alarm people, who tell me to sit down and offer to bring me water. This can be useful at times.
So now I have a big muddy hole in the backyard with a bunch of dead roots strewn across my lawn and many more still to extract. Then I get to put all the mud back, compact it with a hand tamper because I am too cheap to rent a motorized one, lay weed barrier fabric, and put all the pavers back.
But first I will obsess about how the weed barrier cannot possibly stop tree root shoots that look like giant bunches of bean sprouts. Amazingly strong bean sprouts. So strong they push up the pavers and look like little aliens reaching for the sun. And if they are so strong, should I bother with the weed barrier? Won’t that make it harder to get to, and dig out, the bean sprouts once they push a paver up and out of alignment? And what about leveling? Shouldn’t I put down sand to properly level the pavers? But isn’t that yet another level to go through if the alien bean sprouts cause misalignment?
I may have a muddy hole in my backyard for some time while I struggle with decision coma brought on by pre-DIY’ers remorse.

